Mark 10:5-16

Today I want to look with you about the importance of the family. This is the second message of the series, Promises Worth Keeping. Hold on to your seat belt this morning, because its candid moments about marriage and family for lives that aren’t perfect. If you have a perfect family, please leave during the prayer time, because you really won’t understand the rest of us.

 In the movie, Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Professor Kariacticus Potts is raising his two young children by himself. He is an impractical inventor who has not had a lot of success in life, but he knows his love for his kids. Let’s watch

 He doesn’t show how he automatically cleans up the dishes, but otherwise, I would love an automated breakfast. But what shines through is his commitment to his family. The human community has been founded through marriage, parents, children, and the experience of being the people of God. It is such a glorious gift that it requires a special response from you and me. We need the words, ‘I Promise You’ in the experience of family because it is not easy to keep together. And we are going to look at a passage today from the Gospel of Mark to call us again to this glad duty and some ideas on how we can keep our promises alive.

 This reading from the Gospel of Mark is a strong affirmation of the commitments of marriage and the importance of children. I hope that every person here will find some blessing in the theme of this day. But it is a hard topic. If your family portrait is incomplete or only has one person in it on Valentine’s Day, then does God have any special word for you?

 Let’s start with I Promise You as it relates to marriage. Jesus has an argument with the Pharisees just before these verses about divorce. And people have asked if there is any inconsistency between Paul, and Moses, and Jesus on this topic. No, there is not. They are responding in different settings. The common point is that marriage is a very special promise and divorce is always a tragedy.

 Is there anyone here who disagrees with that? We don’t like to say this in church because many committed Christians have experienced brokenness in family life. And I have to say that this message is hard for me because I know this brokenness in my own life. What keeps us going at such moments is that God’s forgiving and renewing grace. Paul says to the Ephesians [Eph 2:8] For by grace you have been saved through faith, and this is not your own doing; it is the gift of God—

 The reason we go back to these foundational teachings on marriage is to speak to people to try for relationships as God intends. A lot of Christians speak with me frankly about their lives so these comments are not drawn from any one person. But a lot of Christians are sexually involved with one or two persons a year. People are giving up on the idea of marriage since they can see the problems. And all we are saying this morning is that there is a better plan. If you wait for that one person to whom you can make a lifetime promise before bringing sex into the relationship, it still is a design for the most happiness.

 How does this apply to you if you are in the middle of brokenness? Here are some Christians that I know who are in need of rescue. A young man had affairs with four women, children with two, became a Christian and was attracted to a woman in church. A young woman with a wonderful daughter and a Christian background has had sex with 49 men. Two pastor’s sons who think they are in love with each other, but it quickly turns into a brief and destructive affair.

 The good news is that your salvation is near. Jesus accepts the worship of the prostitute in Luke 7 and the religious people are aghast. They mutter against him. But Christ says. [Luke 7:48] Then he said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." [Luke 7:49] But those who were at the table with him began to say among themselves, "Who is this who even forgives sins?" [Luke 7:50] And he said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."

 If you have sadly left the design for a covenantal relationship, then accept forgiveness and peace and try to recapture the covenant. There is a new day around the words, ‘I Promise You’

 The commitment is not just to marriage but to children. Mark places Jesus among the children as the disciples try to get rid of them. It happens right after the marriage comments. God has always blessed me with children who were better than I deserve.

But healthy families require parents and kids who can say, ‘I Promise You.’ Before I had kids, I was blissfully unaware of how much it takes to get a child through college and into a decent life. Of course, I had my own challenges growing up, but I figured that those were all accidents that I would avoid with my own children.

 In 1980, before our first child was due, I subscribed to the Green Tigers newsletter. The idea was that if you handled your child right from day one, they would be twice as smart as the average bear. I was ready for this. We were supposed to talk near the crib each day and discuss a variety of events. Children often choose their political party before their first birthday. You see, being a Green Tiger meant shaping and molding the young mind. So when the doctor came out of the birthing room to tell me that Hilary had Down’s Syndrome, I was not ready for it. I thought I knew what it means to say I promise you, but it was more.

 Jesus and Paul preached about marriage and practiced singleness. Jesus was particularly close to Peter, James, and John, and Lazarus, Mary, and Martha. The second group probably had more of a family feel for him. He went to their home for rest. Paul had Barnabas and possibly Silas. Marriage is an intense expression of the family experience that we can all enjoy. We encourage these feelings through the Disciple Groups and the ministry groups like the choir and Kids Club. No one is left out of the family experience. Our new group for the Middle Years that Joan and Linda are starting is another wonderful way that promotes family relationships for single people.

 If you are not happy with the family experience you now have, you have some power to change it. I am not trying to diminish the desire of a person who does not want to be single. But building brother and sister relationships can help. Yesterday a single guy expressed to me how he would like to be a father. But there are experiences like tutoring or foster care where you can try things out.

 My grand children are growing up in Maine, North Carolina, and Dallas. And what I miss is holding a baby. I don’t really want to raise one again, but I’m not getting a rich grandfather experience either. I’ve come up with a new idea – I’d like to rent one locally for an hour or two. 

 The truth is that our biological families are sometimes not there or they are there only partially. In addition to God’s forgiving and restoring grace, there is also the power of close friendship which can be in the form of partner, brother, sister, son, daughter, father or mother. And the family feelings can be as close as flesh and blood. We don’t often tell people how much they mean to us.

 This message is intense because there is a strong word for all of us. Look at your relationships in life. And where can you strengthen one by saying I Promise You.